Why Speakers Need to Think Beyond Starting Conversations – Podcast 27
So, your speech is over, applause has subsided, and it’s time for you to sit down. Assuming you’ve started a conversation, what happens next?
If your words have struck a chord, heads will have nodded, hearts and minds will have been won, and your audience will be minded to take action when they leave the room.
Great. But, that’s commonly not enough.
Without follow up, there’s a good chance that notions many of your audience members mean to adopt will be derailed. Other priorities, distractions, and/or life can get in the way. And the upshot?
Well, you know that old expression that: “The way to Hell is paved with good intentions”?
OK, so what’s a body to do?
Here’s the thing, a well-delivered speech will absolutely help you to start conversations. The trick then is to make sure the conversation continues after the microphone has been turned off. And since, increasingly, these conversations need to happen online as well as offline, you need a plan to make this happen.
Enter the Power of Relationship Marketing
Of course, when this phrase or school of thinking first came into vogue in the mid to late 1960s and started to appear in marketing text books in the 1970s, it was seen as an elixir or Holy Grail for those who sold products (mostly of the low ticket variety) through direct marketing. The ideas were simple.
A quick analysis of those who were most successful in direct marketing in bygone times (and who are still going today) – like Lands’ End, L L Bean, and more – showed that those who focused on cultivating long term versus ad hoc relationships with their customers won the day more often.
And the reasons for their success were simple. They all understood that:
- People who bought via remote means once would, providing their experiences were good, likely buy this way again and again in the future
- For reasons of customer acquisition costs, it has always been difficult for direct marketers to make much money from a first transaction. Significant profits are more likely to happen where customers could be encouraged to make repeated/regular purchases, and
- Focusing on the lifetime value of customers proved to be a consistently better approach that concentrating only on the worth of a next, individual transaction.
The bottom line was this. Those who created better, long term relationships won a lot more than the ‘once off’ or ‘one by one’ mindset merchants.
And although those still using traditional, interruption style direct marketing models may have experienced rapid falloff in their results over the last decade…
…The notions behind the value and importance of nurturing and cultivating long-term relationships still hold extraordinary value for modern communicators seeking to influence others online and offline.
All of which will make the views and advice offered by hall of fame keynote speaker, author, and relationship marketing expert Terry Brock in today’s expert interview of huge interest and value to speakers of every ilk.
After Your Microphone is Turned Off, What Happens Next?
Listen in as we discuss:
- Why your job as a speaker isn’t done as soon as the mic is turned off
- The importance of strategic thinking when cultivating online relationships
- What everyone should know about plans of attack and rear view mirrors
- Achieving a combo of balance and better results from your communications in a frenetic world
- Why growing bigger ears will help you to connect at once with new audiences
- 2 secrets that’ll win you more word of mouth (or mouse) support for your ideas
- An awful mistake that can stop your online relationships from flourishing
- A single action that can transform your ability to create lasting and rewarding relationships
- And more
Over to You
What strategies have you used to continue conversations you started when at the podium?
What are your keeper ideas and what have you jettisoned? And what lessons would you share?
Interview Transcript
Eamonn O’Brien: Today we’re talking about a really interesting topic. You know as speakers, when the microphone is turned off, the truth is, your job is not over. The truth is, it’s only just begun. And when it comes to cultivation of relationships, both during and after the occasion, we have a fantastic expert in the show today. It is, Terry Brock, all the way from Florida. Terry?
Terry Brock: Hey man, it’s great to be with you here, and as a matter of fact, I’m not even in the chair today. I’m out moving around trying the new standing up routine, so it’s kind of fun.
Eamonn: Good. Now, Terry, of course you have an extraordinary background. You’re a Hall of Fame keynote speaker, a social media marketing expert, and co-author with the lovely Gina, of Klout Matters, which is all about influence.
Terry: Yes, that’s true. You forgot about my really good haircut too.
Eamonn: You know my father didn’t have much hair, and he would say that that was just a wide parting.
Terry: A wide parting. This is a very wide parting, yes, that’s right.
What you’re talking about, I think, really, is all about relationships. And it’s about building relationships with people, so that you establish them, and then you build them, and then here’s the most important – maintaining those relationships. That’s really what it’s about.
Eamonn: Yes, and today, really, Terry, relationships have always been important, but now that more and more communication is occurring online, why is it even more important for us to pay attention to who we are communicating with, how we are communicating, and in fact, how we kind of pull the pieces together.
Terry: I think it’s important because now the world is shifting such that we have really a worldwide market. As speakers, it really doesn’t matter where you are. Geography really doesn’t matter as much. What does matter is the connections with people because you and I were able to meet, you were kind enough to come to the program that we did there in Ireland, and got a chance to see it and come to find out that you have connection in my home state of Michigan, in the United States, with your mother being from St. Joseph. . .
Eamonn: Yes, my mother in law.
Terry: . . . and we get a chance to really build those relationships. Because we are in different countries really doesn’t matter. And the fact that now we’ve got the technology to connect so that we’re having a video connection right now, we can see each other live, we can hear each other live, it’s a wonderful thing. We couldn’t do this before, and I want you to know I’m so happy for this. I’m going to go ahead and pay for the Google+ hangout that we’re doing right now. How’s that?
Eamonn: Good man, thank you.
Terry: That’s where I’ll be. I realize there’s none so that’s good.
Eamonn: [laughs] Well, you know there’s a lot of ‘trick and treating’ happening today because you may or may not know today is all about Halloween. And since we are talking about r-commerce, I think it’s about time we had our first arrr!
Terry: Yes arrr, I like that, yes, with the pirate thing. That’s good. And you notice I have the king’s hat out here because in America, we don’t have the official kings and queens but we’re all kings in America. Yes indeed.
Eamonn: Yes. The customer is indeed king, so I should probably lose this and find another adornment. In developing the relationships, and you talked about the fact that here we are having a conversation, you’re in Florida and I am here in Dublin, but the truth is we are all so time strapped, and we all have so much happening in our lives that we can’t be all things to all people. So maybe share your thoughts on, if you like, the importance of being a little bit strategic about what you’re doing, and how to make the most of those relationships.
Terry: Yes, I think you hit the key word there. It’s strategic. You have to think through how you’re going to live your life, how you’re going to conduct business. Because we can reach people internationally, that’s good, but one thing, though, there is a genuine challenge that we cannot overcome. It is time differences. For us right here, now it is 11 after 2 on a Friday afternoon. Over in Australia, it is about 4 in the morning, over in Sydney and Melbourne, and we’re doing business with these people all around. And so somebody is going to be sleeping, somebody is going to be awake, and that means that whenever you’re ready to do business, you’ve got to look at where they are.
So strategy becomes the important part of it. Of thinking what you’re going to do. We use, a lot, a checklist, my partner Gina Carr and I. It helps us to see each day what it is that we’re doing in each week. Are we going through the checklist? We’re using just a Google hangout, not Google hangout, actually Google Doc.
Eamonn: Google Doc?
Terry: You share the spreadsheet at Google. Very simple, no complication there, just every day, did we do this, and put an X there. Or how much was this score, or that score, etc. I even keep track of the price of gold and bit coin. So, what was the price of gold on this day, what was the price of bit coin on that day, and then I can track it over a quarter. I use the 90 days roughly over a quarter and be able to track and see what’s going on with how many posts I did on Facebook, on LinkedIn, things like that, so that we have that overall strategy as you say.
Eamonn: Well I like that on two fronts because you’re doing two things actually in the same breadth. Number one, you’re thinking about what you’re going to do, so the planning is there. Second thing is that you’re actually checking to see what happened. So you’re not basically going on blindly, you’re really thinking through: “Okay, so we thought this would happen, we’ve done this, we’ve done that.”
And it’s dynamic because the truth is that the capacity that changes in how tools are used, the new tools that come on board, there’s constant overwhelm and so you do have to constantly test and see what’s happening.
Terry: Yes, absolutely. You want to test all the time, keep checking, and a good way to do that is a little spreadsheet like that. It doesn’t take a lot. You put the days across the top, and the activities down the side and tracking those even the point on goals and personal activities. For instance, for me, every day is important I talk about my books on this that you have study; you have exercise, and meditation. Tailoring that to what works for you. So I put down my exercise, how far I would go on the treadmill, you know, what I would do. And if I run, I usually run like three miles and what I did on each of them. And then like with meditation, did I do that? Study, what did I read? Did I listen to this? Did I do something else?
And then I can go back at the end of a quarter. The quarter is a good time. You’ve got 90 days. You know you’re going to have some up days, some down days, but over a quarter, you can get a lot of information. And then at the end of the year, go back over the year and say, okay, how did I do? Oh yes, I remember that day when so and so came by. I’ll put in there people that I want to visit. For instance, I will put in to my video connections, the one you and I are having, right now.
Eamonn: Exactly.
Terry: I can remember that.
Eamonn: Good, I’m glad. Interestingly you’re using the word reflection in there, and I think, you see, that’s so important. I know you’re a great studier of history. I saw something, maybe just three four months ago, and it was talking about how presidents in bygone years actually used their time. And it was so interesting to see time and again that there were schedule times, specifically schedule time for reflection.
Terry: Yes, that’s very important to have that time to step back, otherwise we’re just going at a phonetic pace and that’s so easy to do in our fast paced world today. That we’re just going, “I’ve got this to do. I’ve got that to do.” There is always something to do. There’s always a new Facebook post, or a new website, or a new article that’s out there, a podcast. Specifically I have to take time to step back and reflect and I often would call that meditation, whether you do it in a formal way or maybe it’s prayer, or just sitting quietly and reflect and think. I think that’s critical for us, and yes, we turn the cell phones off. Our mobile phones we turn them off. We get away in barring and emergency. I’m going to be quiet, I’m going to be alone, I’m not going to answer the phone. We have a wonderful thing called voicemail. Take that time ever day to be quiet and to reflect.
As a matter of fact, Eamonn, I’m going to share something with you and your audience right now.
Eamonn: Good.
Terry: I’m taking my camera, and I’ll show you a way that I do that right now looking out over the lake.
Eamonn: Lovely.
Terry: It’s very good to see all the view, and, by the way, look out there, beautiful blue sky today here in Orlando, and I can see that. And just sitting out there in my balcony, you’re seeing. Probably we’re getting really intimate here. There is our balcony, and I’ll sit out there and just relax and quietly think or meditate on what’s going on. I think everyone should have a place like that. It’s a place that’s in your mind.
Eamonn: They should. And I’ll tell you so, that you are showing off a little, I have to say, Terry, because if I did the same thing in Dublin right now, it’s lashing rain. It wouldn’t have nearly the same effect.
Terry: Yes, the rain. We do get that out here too. It’s true, but you know here’s the beauty of it, in your mind, everyone can find that wonderful quiet perfect place.
Eamonn: Yes.
Terry: It might be that mountain side retreat you saw once before, or that lake where you grew up as a child, or that forest. Whatever works for you, go there in your mind on a regular daily basis. That kind of reflection in quietness is not only a good idea, I would even submit it’s necessary in our very frantic, busy world that we have today.
Eamonn: Right, it centers our thinking. It absolutely does. And speaking of centering of thinking, you know you and I have talked before about your global speaking acumen, and the types of experiences you’ve had in going from location to location. One of the challenges for speakers when they do it overseas is, truthfully, the audience, of course, is coming from a different place, whether being points of reflection or anywhere else.
I’m interested in your thoughts about how you mould, how you shape, how you alter what you do and how you do it when you’re dealing with audiences that are not like those you’re going to find in sunny Florida or nearby.
Terry: But as a speaker, and this is specifically to those that are speakers, we have wonderful opportunities to earn money and to really get educated. That’s what traveling is. Education wherever we go.
Just recently I was in Mexico. About two hours south of Mexico City speaking. They were interpreting what I said into Spanish. The next day I got back to Orlando, did the laundry real fast, hopped on the plane the next day and went over to Germany, speaking over there. They had interpreters there for it only in German and I find what we have to is, we have to go in with an inquisitive mind. Make sure that you always keep an open, questioning, accepting, how do you do it here mind.
One of the things I like to do is learn how to speak at least a few words in those languages wherever I go. My Spanish is absolutely horrendous right now, I’m working on it. My German is even worse, but I try to communicate at least a few words and what they’re doing so that I can say, “Muchas gracias, senor” when I’m in Mexico where they’re speaking Spanish, or, “Danke sehr,” when I’m over in Germany. Learn a little bit of that and really go in with an attitude of, “What can I learn here. How can I be of benefit to them?” Be aware of what’s going on. I can say for Americans that are watching this, get out of your American skin. You know, don’t think, “Well, this is the way we do it in America therefore you ought to do it that way here.” Well that’s baloney. There’s another more colorful military term, but I’ll use the word baloney.
[laughter]
We need to get rid of that, and we need to be much more accommodating in learning and to go “Oh really? Tell me about that. I didn’t know that. I have not heard that before. Tell me the way that you think or why you believe this way,” rather than a confrontational point of view. I think we learn a lot more that way and get along with people a lot better.
Eamonn: I love that, Terry, and, as you know, my background is in cross-cultural marketing. I used to make hundreds and hundreds of commercials in lots of different languages, and what you said is absolutely right. The first thing you want to do is you want to come from the other person’s point of view, and you need to listen.
Terry: Yes, absolutely. You have to. I think Chris Brogan says it really well. He says we need to grow bigger ears.
Eamonn: Oh cool. [laughs] Mine are quite big.
Terry: That’s good. Well they can be, and I think we all can have even bigger ears. I certainly want to be able to listen more, and I think we do better that way. Going back to what you said, my ancestors, part of my ancestry is native Americans, and they would say, “To walk a mile in the other man’s moccasins,” To understand it from that other person’s point of view is critical.
Eamonn: Yes, and tell me, when it comes to, if you like, cultivating and kind of growing relationships. So let’s think about the conversations over the microphone has been turned off and now our job is, if you like, to have the conversation continue. So when you call a word of mouth or as Connor Capital [SP] was in talk with me here recently, he called it “word of mouse”. I don’t know whether that was his, but I’m going to give him credit. What are your thoughts about that and what you’ve learned in that realm?
Terry: Oh I would agree that I think that “word of mouse” that we talk about a lot is very important. What Connor is saying, yes, that’s critical, but if you just meet someone and you just swings cards and say, “Yes, great to meet you,” et cetera, if that’ all you do, you’ve lost your effort, all that you’ve put into that. Much better is to follow up, staying in touch with people. A good way to do that is for you to have a blog or a podcast or something, so that people can stay in touch with you.
A way we do it today is with social media. Get on social media with the people. And I find that’s enjoyable because then I get a chance to know them as people. I get a chance to know where they are, what’s important to them, and get to know more about this person that I just met, that I think, wow a wonderful person. By using social media, we can do that literally worldwide.
Eamonn: And it is really incredible the level and nature of conversation we can have.
Terry: Yes, absolutely. I think we get to know people, and, matter of fact, if you don’t mind, one of the things I’m going to say right now, over your head, it looks like you have some samurai swords. Is that correct? Over your left shoulder?
Eamonn: It’s not a samurai.
Terry: Up there on the top?
Eamonn: No, you’re looking at photographic equipment and some of it very, very old. Some of it you know we’re going back to the brownie and before so if you ever seen those cor blimey, what’s the name of that song that Tommy Steele sang in that very silly movie from back in the ‘50s or ‘60s? It will come to me in a second. Anyway, Water Photograph [SP] was the name of the song and it’s akin to that.
Terry: But you see, that’s a good example. With this technology that we have today, all the people that are watching right now, including me, are looking right directly into your study. So there are personal pictures, things that reflect your personality. I thought all those look like samurai swords because I have some. Japan is a big part of my life and I like it. And then also you see the books that are here, for me, you know, because books are an important part of what I do in my life and I love reading and learning, and so we get a chance today as never before to really be in someone’s home, see what’s going on, and get a chance to build that relationship and the relationships that are going to be really solid and last a long time.
Eamonn: I couldn’t agree more. And in the context of building relationships that can last a long time, and to use an Americanism, if you were thinking about Danger, Will Robinson, and things that you mustn’t and shouldn’t do in cultivating relationships, what would be top of your list?
Terry: I’d say trying to force something on someone. Advertise a little hardcore or hardcore ideas and embrace a lot the idea of freedom and liberty, libertarian ideas that you don’t force something on someone else. You never initiate force or coercion. Defend yourself, yes, absolutely, but never initiate. I think too often people try to force something. I see it on LinkedIn. You might have seen this as well.
I have a policy on LinkedIn that I do it a little bit differently than the recommended LinkedIn. I accept people who say, “Hey, can I follow you?” For the most part, by default, I accept that. The reason is, as a speaker, and speakers will relate to this, let’s assume you just gave a presentation. You had many people in the audience. They loved you. You were great. The standing ovation or they just cheered you and some people leave. Not everyone is going to come up and see you personally. Someone that might love you could have been in that audience and they had to leave very quickly after the end. They want to stay in touch with you.
So I’d befriend all the people. However, to avoid something, sometimes I’ve seen people that as soon as I friend them, immediately they bounce back saying, “Hi, we’re wonderful, we do this kind of thing. You ought to buy from us because of this,” and I immediately go on and say, “No, I’m removing that connection.”
Eamonn: That really irritates me. It’s a pet peeve, actually.
Terry: Yes, me too. It’s like they don’t know me and they’re trying to tell me that they do programming, or they design websites, or they do whatever, and, good for them. I love entrepreneurs and I think they should have the right to explain it but they need to do that in a different way. I want to get to know them as a person, particularly on LinkedIn. If they want to send an ad and I notice their name is on an ad that’s on LinkedIn that’s there to pay the bills for LinkedIn, great, that’s okay. I understand it, but please don’t just immediately start selling stuff to me because we just made a connection.
Eamonn: I couldn’t agree more. And then if you like to round up, and I knew we were going to have a great chat tonight, Terry, so thank you so much for doing that. I know it’s afternoon for you. Quick question for you, if you were to think about the hardest lesson that you’ve had to learn over all of the years, and you have been so involved in social media and the leading edge social media for a number of years, what’s the hardest lesson you had to learn? And what could you share on the back of that?
Terry: Gee, I never thought of that. I would guess it would probably be that discipline is necessary and I’m still learning it, still learning as we go. It’s like, okay, you did a great job last Wednesday. Last Thursday you were good, and Friday you were good, but guess what, now it’s a new week and you’ve got to get started again and so to continually renew. But then that’s how we stay alive. Biologically we do best physically, spiritually, mentally. We do best when we’re constantly stretching and growing, constantly getting in there. Do that work on the treadmill, do those swimming laps. We’ve got a wonderful time to get out and swim a lot in Florida.
I love that and being able to read. You might have read a couple of books last week, read a few more now. So I think it’s really the discipline. To stay with it, particularly, when you’re body is going, “No, you don’t have to. No, just rest today.” You’ve got to go on and you’ve got to kick yourself and say, “I’m going to get out there and do whatever it takes dogged determination and make it happen.
Eamonn: Yes, I think that those are wonderful words of advice and I want to thank you for joining me today, Terry. I really appreciate it.
Terry: Thank you Eamonn, it is great to be with you, my friend.
Eamonn: Good. Well, thank you for listening in today. You have been listening to the Reluctant Speakers Club. Our expert series, and until the next time, great speaking.
Photo Credit: Norlando Pobre